I’ll admit it, I watch more cartoons than would be considered “normal” for someone my age. As a result, my television is frequently turned into Nickelodeon. As such, I’ve noticed a certain song called Windows Down
being played during every. Single. Commercial break. EVERY ONE!
Currently, Nick is attempting to cash in on the sudden resurgence of boybands by pushing Big Time Rush forward with a new summer single. With Windows Down, the group is attempting to break out of the Nickelodeon bubble. Much like how Boyfriend actually got some decent radioplay, Windows Down has begun a steady climb up the charts.
But lets talk about this for a minute, okay? If you’ve read my review of Boyfriend, then you know that I’ve actually met the guys in a very impromptu and casual setting. I think they’re very cool, down to earth dudes, and it really was a pleasure getting to know them outside of their Nickelodeon personas. No bad blood here.
That said, Windows Down is bad. So bad! It actually plays as if they found a checklist of everything you have to do in a pop song, checked off every one, but forgot to do any of them well.
The power-pop sound is may be fun and catchy, and actually shows the group maturing into more adult sounds. However, the breakdowns try so hard to sound dubstep, but they fail in a huge way. Unfortunately, the lyrics are so comically bad, that it works against the “tween” image they’re trying to break. Vocally, the group possess only moderate talent, but their voices are so fine tuned with computers that even that is hard to see. The music video is terrible, and plays like a 3 minute excuse to get the group shirtless and acting like frat boys while still remaining tween friendly.
However, none of this is quite as bad as their biggest offense. This song heavily features samples from Blur’s rock anthem, Song 2. Between the infamous guitar riffs and “whoo hoo!”s, Blur’s influence is all over this song. I don’t mind an artist using samples, and Song 2 actually lends itself to a dance beat quite well. However, this sample is executed horribly. It seems like everything good about the song was added by Blur themselves, and the song’s actual artists did nothing but take their work, ruin it, and call it their own. I call bull on that.
Windows Down tried so hard to be a summer jam, and for 11 year tweens who don’t know any better, it might be. However, it winds up becoming more like the wrapper to a half melted pop sickle. Absolute summer garbage that sticks to you when you just want to throw it away.
Final Score: 1/5